Ngan

I'm not really sure why I'm feeling this way. But I think it has a lot to do with me being awfully sick. Its not only an epiphany, which i'm currently having, but also this empowering feeling. I feel like I can make a decision and be straight with it. I'm fed up and tired of the bullshit. I'm tired of being unappreciated of. And its just dawning on me that I am a very good sister, friend, girlfriend, daughter. I give and I love 100%. And I feel sorry for anyone who will take that for granted. Its more like, I know that if i'm not there for you anymore, you will soon realize you lost someone of great value. And I don't usual like to talk highly of myself (actually, I've yet to do that until now). But, I know my worth. I know how I treat others and the respect I give. I have principles, manners, respect, love. Its such a shame honestly.. That there are not that many people like me and some of only a few people that I do know who have the same principles as I. Right now, I have this "Fuck you" attitude towards everyone who has taken advantage of my kindness. Like honestly..? Maybe its my fault for being nice? (But should I really be blaming myself? It is okay for others to walk all over you?) I give no one that permission. And even when I try to get my say, its flipped on me- like i'm the bad person. What motherfucker? Did you just not realize the things I've done for you?..

I'm just saying.. I'm fed up.. really fed up.
New day, same reoccurring problem. People are suppose to change for the better. So learn not to go down the wrong path. Forget not, those who have always been there for you. And always remember to appreciate them. And to show it..
Well tomorrows the beginning of spring fling..
I'll be getting schwasted! So until then.. Have a good weekend

Your bud,
Ngan